How to Know if a Shy Guy Likes You in High School

Co-authored by Joshua Pompey

Last Updated: July 14, 2020

Even though shy teenaged boys can be tough to figure out, there are signs and signals that you can learn to spot to see if one likes you. Being shy doesn't mean that they won't give off any information, it just might be harder to interpret or notice. By watching his behavior and body language, getting to know him, and interacting with him, you can get a better idea of whether or not a shy guy likes you!

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:
Watching His Behavior

1
Catch him glancing at you. If a shy guy likes you, he might be afraid to talk to you. Instead, he will probably try to steal some glances in your direction. If you notice him looking at you, he will look away as quickly as possible. This doesn't mean he doesn't like you. In fact, it can mean just the opposite.^{[1]
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Expert Source

Joshua Pompey
Relationship Expert
Expert Interview. 27 November 2019.}
2
Notice him light up when he sees you. If he likes you, he might light up when you come around. Look for a smile and a twinkle in his eyes when he sees you. This might mean that he likes you, especially if he doesn't react this way when other people come around.^{[2]
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3
Take note of awkward interactions. If he likes you, he will probably be nervous around you. If he seems especially awkward around you (dropping things, stumbling over his words) it might mean he likes you.^{[3]
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- You can help ease his awkwardness by giving him your undivided attention.
- Also, avoid laughing at him if he drops something or stumbles over his words.

Method 2

Method 2 of 3:
Interacting with Him

1
Notice him saying "hi" to you. If a shy guy likes you, he might not be able to walk right up to you and start a conversation. Instead, he might only be able to say hello. If he waves at you, nods, or musters a quiet "hi" (especially if he's not doing this for other people), he might have the hots for you.^{[4]
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2
Talk with him on social media. Fortunately for shy guys, talking in person isn't the only way to communicate. If he tries to communicate with you on social media (or by text message, email, or paper notes), even if he doesn't talk with you much in person, it could be a good sign.^{[5]
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3
Don't be upset if he talks to your friends. If you are standing around with a group of friends and this shy guy walks up and starts talking to them, it could actually be a good sign. It is possible that he is just working up the courage to talk to you by talking to you friends.^{[6]
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4
Give him your full attention. When he does try to talk to you (or ask you out), pay full attention to him. It might be very difficult for him to start interacting with you one-on-one, so try to be patient and focused for him! Remember: if he is awkward it probably just means he is nervous.^{[7]
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Research source} You show you are paying attention to him by:
- Nodding when he speaks.
- Maintaining eye contact.
- Providing verbal cues (things like "sure," "yeah," "totally").
- Responding when it's your turn to speak.
- Avoiding looking at your phone.

Method 3

Method 3 of 3:
Noticing Subtle Actions

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Watch him recall specific details. If a shy guy really likes you, he won't make grand gestures of affection. Instead, he will show that he likes you in small, sweet ways. For instance, he might remember details about you and things that you tell him. This shows that you stand out to him and he cares about you!^{[8]
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Notice him stick up for you. If a shy guy likes you, you might catch him standing up for you. If your friends tease you or say something rude about you (even if they are joking), he might quietly say they are wrong.^{[9]
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- He might say, "I don't think Jaime acts that way." He might say, "That's not true," or "That's not how I see it."
3
Hear him getting teased by his friends. If a high school guy likes you, chances are his friends already know. (Maybe he told them, or maybe they can just tell.) If his friends start teasing him and giving him a hard time when you come around, it might mean that he's into you.^{[10]
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Community Q&A
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Question

How do you know if a guy likes you secretly in school?

Joshua Pompey
Relationship Expert
Joshua Pompey is a Relationship Expert with over 10 years of helping people navigate the online dating world. Joshua has run his own relationship consulting business since 2009 at a success rate of over 99%. His work has been featured in CNBC, Good Morning America, Wired, and Refinery29 and he has been referred to as the best online dater in the world.

Joshua Pompey

Relationship Expert

Expert Answer

Support wikiHow by unlocking this expert answer.

If they make a lot of eye contact and they smile a lot when they're talking to you, it's a good sign they're interested in you. The biggest sign is if they go out of their way to physically touch you, though. Little brushes on your elbow, shoulder, or back are a huge sign that they like you, so look out for those!
Question

Can I tell if a guy is falling in love in me just by the way he looks at me?

Community Answer

If he looks at you often and in a dreamy/loving way, it could be a good sign. But it's only one sign. How does he talk to you? Are there other signals that he may be into you?
Question

Is it normal to have a crush on two guys?

Community Answer

Yes. It happens all the time.
Question

If a guy kissed me and acts like we're dating, what does that mean?

Community Answer

It could mean that he really likes you. Does he act this way no matter who is around? The best thing to do is to talk to him.
Question

What does it means when a guy texts you outside school, but inside school he doesn't talk to you.

Community Answer

Well, it probably means one of two things-- - Either he is really shy. - Or he doesn't like you that way. If he seems shy or socially awkward in other situations, maybe he just doesn't know how to talk to you in person! Give him some time to figure it out.
Question

I have a crush on a guy, but I don't know if he likes me.

Community Answer

Look for some clues! Does he want to spend time with you? Do you catch him looking at you from across the room? Truly, the best way to find out how he feels is to ask him.
Question

I am a freshman in love with my shy junior best friend. I know that shy guys hate confrontations. How can I tell him how I feel without making him uncomfortable?

Community Answer

Start small. Don't come right out and say you love him. Try asking him if he wants to go on a real date sometime.
Question

If a guy gave me his jacket when it was cold outside the school, does this mean he likes me?

Community Answer

It might! It is a good sign, but look for a few more signs to be sure.
Question

How do I know if my friend likes me? He's my new classmate so I don't know him well.

Community Answer

Everybody is different so it's hard to say. Does he want to sit near you or spend time with you? Do you catch him looking at you? Does he smile a lot when you are near him? Try some gentle flirting and see how he responds.
Question

I am a gay guy who has a crush on a possible straight guy. He keeps looking at me and asks me questions and his eyes are so pretty. How can I tell if he likes me?

Community Answer

If you're not sure if he is gay, it can be hard to tell. You might misread his friendship signals as signs that he likes you. But there are a few things to look for: - Does he ever sit close to you? Or lean toward you? Or touch you? This could be a good sign. - You could ask him if he wants to hang out sometime, and see how he reacts. - If you are feeling brave, you could tell him that you're gay and he how he reacts to that info.

Warnings

Do not try to stalk him. This will only make him feel insecure and stay away from you furthermore. He may even develop a harsh attitude and not even realize it. Try not to do stalk him or have your friends stalk him. His feelings will be crushed and chances of being around him are near zero.

Thanks!
Helpful 4 Not Helpful 1
Some shy guys despise sarcasm and personal jokes. Shy guys tend to like people that are loyal and mean what they say.

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