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This article was co-authored by Rebecca Tenzer, MAT, MA, LCSW, CCTP, CGCS, CCATP, CCFP and by wikiHow staff writer, Madeleine Criglow. Rebecca Tenzer is the owner and head clinician at Astute Counseling Services, a private counseling practice in Chicago, Illinois. With over 18 years of clinical and educational experience in the field of mental health, Rebecca specializes in the treatment of depression, anxiety, panic, trauma, grief, interpersonal relationships using a combination of Cognitive Behavioral therapy, Psychodynamic therapy, and other evidence-based practices. Rebecca holds a Bachelor of Arts (BA) in Sociology and Anthropology from DePauw University, a Master in Teaching (MAT) from Dominican University, and a Master of Social Work (MSW) from the University of Chicago. Rebecca has served as a member of the AmeriCorps and is also a Professor of Psychology at the collegiate level. Rebecca is trained as a Cognitive Behavioral Therapist (CBT), a Certified Clinical Trauma Professional (CCTP), a Certified Grief Counseling Specialist (CGCS), a Clinical Anxiety Treatment Professional (CCATP), and a Certified Compassion Fatigue Professional (CCFP). Rebecca is also a member of the Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Society of America and The National Association of Social Workers.
There are 11 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
If you're having trouble controlling your mind, know that it's completely normal. Whether you're processing a breakup or overwhelmed with negative thoughts, everyone struggles with this sometimes. As tough as it may be, there are a lot of things you can do to take back control and approach things from a calmer, positive mindset. Read on for some tips so that you can start to think clearly and feel at peace.
Steps
Method 1
Method 1 of 10:Write out your thoughts.
Method 1
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1Identify what emotions you're feeling, specifically. Maybe you're upset about a fight with your mom and can't stop thinking about what you said, or perhaps you've been ruminating on what went wrong in your last relationship. Take a pen and paper and write down your thoughts. Be honest with yourself, and try not to avoid the subject that's causing you trouble even if it's painful. Once you're done, reread what you wrote to understand what's causing you to feel this way.[1]
- Avoid suppressing your thoughts, even if they are upsetting. Completely avoiding or burying thoughts can end up having the opposite effect and make you think about them more down the line.[2]
- This helps you understand the source of your lack of control. That way, you can engage with your thoughts honestly and work to move past them in a healthy way.
Method 2
Method 2 of 10:Replace negative thoughts with positive ones.
Method 2
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1Maintain a hopeful perspective. When you start to lose control, it can be easy to think things like "This is all my fault" or "All I do is mess up." These negative thought patterns leave you feeling worse and may be a sign of depression.[3] To regain perspective, stop the negative thoughts as soon as they start. Think something positive instead, like, "This is hard, but I know I can handle it" or "I have friends and family who love me no matter what."[4]
- It may take some practice to start seeing things in a positive light. Just keep trying, even when you slip up and start thinking negatively. Your perspective will change over time.
Method 3
Method 3 of 10:Practice mindfulness.
Method 3
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1This helps you live in the moment. Next time you find yourself ruminating on something you can't control, stop yourself and focus on what you are doing instead. It may sound too simple, but engaging with the present moment can really help you stop yourself from spiraling.[5]
- If you're walking to the bus stop by your house, think to yourself, "It's a Tuesday and I am walking to the bus stop." Notice the weather, the trees swaying in the breeze, and the view as you walk.
Method 4
Method 4 of 10:Meditate daily.
Method 4
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1A daily practice like this helps you clear your mind. Sit somewhere comfortable and take slow, deep breaths. Let your thoughts come and go without attachment. Focus your attention on your body as you inhale and exhale.[6]
- If you're new to meditating, start with 5-minute sessions. Work your way up to 20 minutes as you get more comfortable.
Method 5
Method 5 of 10:Try deep breathing.
Method 5
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1Do this anytime you feel your thoughts spinning out of control. Inhale through your nose for 5 seconds. Then, exhale through your mouth for 5 seconds. As you breathe, repeat a mantra, like "Relax" or "Remain calm."[7]
- When life starts to really stress you out, your fight-or-flight response is activated. Deep breathing helps you get out of this headspace and quiet your mind.
- Try this method anywhere and everywhere. If you're at work and are overwhelmed with thoughts about your responsibilities, take a few seconds to breathe.
Method 6
Method 6 of 10:Engage in a creative outlet.
Method 6
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1A healthy distraction can really help you get your mind off of the subject. Try drawing, painting, or making a collage. Making art can be very therapeutic, and it will help you think about the task at hand rather than the thoughts that have been getting you down. [8]
- Other ways you can express yourself creatively include playing a musical instrument, writing a poem, and dancing to uplifting music.
- You don't have to be an amazing artist to try this method. It's more about the act of making art than the end result.
Method 7
Method 7 of 10:Talk to a trusted family member or friend.
Method 7
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1Talking to someone can help you gain perspective. Vent to a friend or family member about what's on your mind. They can provide some advice or help bring you back down to earth if your thoughts are getting out of control. After you've vented, ask them how they're doing and talk about something else to avoid ruminating.[9]
- Try not to isolate yourself when you're thoughts are getting you down. Friends and family can remind you of all the positive things in your life, even when things are hard.
Method 8
Method 8 of 10:Seek help from a counselor or therapist.
Method 8
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1They can give you tools to manage your thoughts. If you're really struggling to regain control, talking to a professional can help you identify what's happening and provide solutions. Get a referral from your doctor or look online for a therapist or counselor in your area.[10] [11]
- Even just having a space to talk about what's on your mind each week can make you feel more clear-headed.
Method 9
Method 9 of 10:Get 7 hours of sleep each night.
Method 9
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1This can give your mind the energy it needs to think clearly. Establish a healthy bedtime routine that helps you calm down and unwind each day. Turn off your electronics so you're not on your phone right before bed, listen to calming music, do some stretching, or journal. Make this an everyday part of your schedule to start calming your mind for relaxing, rejuvenating sleep.[12]
- Avoid eating right before bed, as this can make it hard to fall asleep.
- Getting good sleep at night helps you tackle life's problems from a more logical, even-keel perspective.
Method 10
Method 10 of 10:Make regular exercise a part of your routine.
Method 10
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1Take good care of your body to help your mind. Engage in 30 minutes of exercise a day, or space it out among 10-minute periods throughout the day. Exercising helps enhance your mood, which can do wonders to stop negative thinking in its tracks. If your mind is stuck on a tough subject, take a break to walk around the block, do some yoga poses, or another activity of your choice.[13]
References
- ↑ https://www.urmc.rochester.edu/encyclopedia/content.aspx?ContentID=4552&ContentTypeID=1
- ↑ https://www.inc.com/amy-morin/how-to-control-your-emotions-so-your-emotions-dont-control-you.html
- ↑ Rebecca Tenzer, MAT, MA, LCSW, CCTP, CGCS, CCATP, CCFP. Clinical Therapist & Adjunct Professor. Expert Interview. 19 August 2020.
- ↑ https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/positive-thinking/art-20043950
- ↑ https://www.addrc.org/7-ways-to-take-control-of-your-mind/
- ↑ https://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/meditation/in-depth/meditation/art-20045858
- ↑ https://health.clevelandclinic.org/embracing-meditation-and-mindfulness-in-a-busy-world/
- ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2804629/
- ↑ https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/articles/5545-women-and-stress
- ↑ Rebecca Tenzer, MAT, MA, LCSW, CCTP, CGCS, CCATP, CCFP. Clinical Therapist & Adjunct Professor. Expert Interview. 19 August 2020.
- ↑ https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/articles/5545-women-and-stress
- ↑ https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/in-depth/sleep-the-foundation-for-healthy-habits/art-20270117
- ↑ https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/articles/5545-women-and-stress
- ↑ https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/articles/5545-women-and-stress
- ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/healthy-eating/healthy-eating.htm
About This Article
Rebecca Tenzer, MAT, MA, LCSW, CCTP, CGCS, CCATP, CCFP
Clinical Therapist & Adjunct Professor
This article was co-authored by Rebecca Tenzer, MAT, MA, LCSW, CCTP, CGCS, CCATP, CCFP and by wikiHow staff writer, Madeleine Criglow. Rebecca Tenzer is the owner and head clinician at Astute Counseling Services, a private counseling practice in Chicago, Illinois. With over 18 years of clinical and educational experience in the field of mental health, Rebecca specializes in the treatment of depression, anxiety, panic, trauma, grief, interpersonal relationships using a combination of Cognitive Behavioral therapy, Psychodynamic therapy, and other evidence-based practices. Rebecca holds a Bachelor of Arts (BA) in Sociology and Anthropology from DePauw University, a Master in Teaching (MAT) from Dominican University, and a Master of Social Work (MSW) from the University of Chicago. Rebecca has served as a member of the AmeriCorps and is also a Professor of Psychology at the collegiate level. Rebecca is trained as a Cognitive Behavioral Therapist (CBT), a Certified Clinical Trauma Professional (CCTP), a Certified Grief Counseling Specialist (CGCS), a Clinical Anxiety Treatment Professional (CCATP), and a Certified Compassion Fatigue Professional (CCFP). Rebecca is also a member of the Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Society of America and The National Association of Social Workers.
Co-authors: 5
Updated: August 6, 2021
Views: 688
Categories: Personality Traits
