How Do You Ask a Foreign Girl Out? 9 Tips to Show Interest and Respect

Co-authored by Connell Barrett and Jessica Gibson

Last Updated: July 26, 2021 References

Asking a girl out is a nerve-wracking experience for anyone, but if she's from another country it can seem like a particular challenge. A lot depends on how well you two can communicate, but you'll still want to learn about dating practices where she's from. If you can make her comfortable around you and show that you respect her, you'll have a great shot at landing a date.

Method 1

Method 1 of 9:
Do some research on dating and cultural practices.

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Her country might have different approaches or expectations. For instance, in a lot of the Western world, you could confidently approach her and directly ask her out for dinner or drinks. However, in some cultures, it might be common practice to talk with her friends and indirectly ask her out. Doing some digging ahead of time is also a great way to learn about potential date ideas.^{[1]
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- You might do web searches for the country she's from along with the phrase "common dating practices." This will give you advice tailored to where she's from. If you make her comfortable when you ask her out, she might be more likely to say yes.
- For instance, you might learn that in her culture, people usually date in a community setting. This might mean going to concerts, volunteering, or going to sporting events together.
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Method 2

Method 2 of 9:
Work on your language skills.

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Try to speak a few sentences in her native language. This is not only charming, it shows that you've put effort into asking her out. Pick a few sentences to really learn like, "Hi, My name is Alex. I'd love to take you out for coffee sometime."^{[2]
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- If you're feeling really confident with your language skills, you could choose a flirty line or two.
- Another trick you can try is to ask her to teach you how to say something. For instance, say, "How do you say, 'Let's go out for a drink?'"

Method 3

Method 3 of 9:
Strike up a conversation about her culture.

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Show interest in where she's from and ask questions to learn more. Not sure how to start talking to her? Asking basic questions about her country is a great place to start! This shows you're interested in what makes her unique and it gives her a chance to open up to you. You may say something like, "What do people do on dates in your country?"^{[3]
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- Try to avoid asking about the politics or religion of her country. Instead, stick with light subjects like what her country's known for, local cuisines, and popular music.
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Method 4

Method 4 of 9:
Let her know you're interested in her.

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You can be as direct or flirtatious as you like.^{[4]
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Expert Source

Connell Barrett
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 24 September 2019.} Flirting comes naturally to some people, but if there's a language barrier, it might be harder to get your point across. You can try to flirt or just tell her that you like her.^{[5]
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- For instance, say, "I don't know how you say it in Spanish, but you captivate me. I'd like to get to know you better," or, "I've never dated a Greek girl, but I'd love to have the chance!"
- For a simple, direct approach, try, "My French is poor, but I'd like to ask you out on a date."

Method 5

Method 5 of 9:
Approach her when she's by herself.

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Talk to her one-on-one instead of in a group so it's more personal. Since a date is a personal thing, it's better to ask her out when she's alone and not hanging out with a bunch of friends. This also reduces pressure on her to either accept or turn you down.^{[6]
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- If she's with a group of friends, you may need to wait for your chance or ask one of her friends to point her in your direction so you can talk.
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Method 6

Method 6 of 9:
Have a specific date in mind.

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Offer to take her out for coffee, a drink, or dessert. You could really ask her out for any activity—the point is to have a plan in mind when you ask her.^{[7]
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Expert Source

Connell Barrett
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 24 September 2019.} She may not be as excited if you ask her to just hang out with you sometime. Saying, "Would you like to go out for tea this weekend?" shows her that you've given it some thought and you're taking steps to make the date happen.^{[8]
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- If you're worried there's a bit of a language barrier, learn a few key words in her language. You might learn "date," "drinks," or "coffee," for instance.
- Skip the standard dinner and a movie date since this doesn't give you many opportunities for talking to her and it's a long time commitment if things aren't working out.

Method 7

Method 7 of 9:
Try a double date if you have friends in common.

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Going out with a few friends could make you both more comfortable. Sometimes, asking a girl out can seem a lot easier if you've got a wingman or wingwoman who can help you out. Approach the girl and tell her that a few of your friends are going to grab dinner or see a band and ask her if she'd like to be your date. This can take some of the pressure off of you both so you can see if you like spending time with one another.^{[9]
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- For example, say, "A few of my friends are going to this club later. Do you want to join me?"
- Don't have any friends willing to double date along with you? No worries! Ask the girl out to a party so you're both hanging out in a group. If things are working out, you could ask her if she wants to leave and go out for dessert, for instance.
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Method 8

Method 8 of 9:
Use a translation app, gestures, or flowers to ask her out.

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Get creative to effectively communicate if you don't speak the same language. The translate feature on most phones is actually really effective! You could also use your hands to gesture to her and you going out together for a drink. Approaching her with flowers in hand is also a great way to help her realize that you're asking her out.^{[10]
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- You might find it easier to ask her out via text message if you already have her number. This can prevent some of the awkwardness. It also gives her an easy way to respond.
- If you're a bit of an artist, you could draw a simple sketch of the two of you walking with your hands held or sitting on a blanket with a picnic. She'll probably get the idea that you're asking her out.

Method 9

Method 9 of 9:
Respect your differences.

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Avoid making a stereotypical comment about her country. Lumping her in with everyone else in her country is not a way to make her feel special! Don't say things like, "Want to go out for a beer? You're German, of course, you do!" She'll feel like you're not taking her seriously and that you're not really into her.^{[11]
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